the coffee cup

when buying DVD’s, get the disc that offers eight-movies in one

i do not condone piracy, but many legitimate DVDs offer more than one film on each disc.  each year, billions of CDs and DVDs are manufactured and millions end up in landfills and incinerators.  so be responsible and get eight Van Damme movies on one disc.  that means eight times the action and eight times the cheesy plots with Van Damme fighting his evil twin.  Remember, only Van Damme can defeat Van Damme.a

hold your breath

any first grader knows that humans breathe our carbon dioxide, so it makes sense that if we breathe less, we release less carbon dioxide — the main culprit in global warming. if each of us just holds our breath for one minute everyday, we can reduce carbon emissions by 10 billion tons per year. so remember, every breath you take is sinking the Maldives.

it’s friday and everyone were excited for the weekend… and since it’s the end of the month, many employees were leaving to try the next chapter of their lives… thus everybody agreed on a lunch out…

i love this day coz it’s the time where you can eat the expensive and tasty food… (just don’t think of the cost, coz it will hurt your wallet hehehe)… aside from that, you can have a long lunch break since everyone were still out at around 1 or 1:30 PM… you can even have a time to buy your  java chip frappucino at the famous starbucks cafe… everyone looks so worried free and has no deadlines to beat… well probably they were just enjoying the time they have and maximize it coz it’s the only time where they can enjoy their food with their officemates and lazily sipping their coffee… it was just a short time perhaps but a relaxing one…

actually, size does matter in some circumstances.  if you and your buddies all had sex with the same woman on the same day, size would matter in “semen displacement.” the guy with the longest penis would have the best chance of getting her pregnant and ensuring his DNA would live on in generations to come.  the longest penis would be better at flushing out a competitor’s semen from the vagina.  the penis has a coronal ridge, which is designed to scoop our foreign semen.  therefore, the longest penis would be able to flush out all those pesky foreigners.  as far as size and pleasuring a woman, that’s a whole other story for whole other day.

–from www.emusclemag.com 

recently M-sensei gave me a JPop Album to try… she said it was the best… she got a copy of the album when she went home in Japan… since i am fond with japanese songs i happily accept it and would try listening to it on my idle time… one thing i like with japanese songs were it’s lyrics and deep message… = ) the album was entitled Kobukuro All Singles Best by Kobukuro… their were really superb and both of them had a nice voice… well their songs were ok of all ok… lyrics(though i understand only a few of it, but ey what’s the use of Wakan? eheheh) were nice with nice messages… i like their acoustics… guitar was so sweet to listen to… as a little information on the band, they actually got their Band Name from their family names Kentarō Kobuchi and Shunsuke Kuroda… one of their songs i like most was 毎朝ボクのいって… nice guitar and song…

[B]
———
Bangin ka ba?, nahulog kasi ako sa’yo..
———
bolero: baket 2 lang bf mo?
playgirl: baket? kelangan ba madami?
bolero: no i’m curious
playgirl: kung pede nga lang isa lang eh tapos forever na yun
bolero: you’re like
playgirl: walang nagkakagusto saken
bolero: oh please. i haven’t even seen u and gs2 na kita.wat more the people who have?
———
Boy: Alam mo para kang kape…
Girl: Huh? Baket?
Boy: Hot… Saka MASARAP! Raaaaaaaawwwrr!
———
boy1: parang nakita kitang tumambay dito kahapon ah
girl: hindi kaya ako dumaan dito kahapon
boy1: hmmm, siguro kasi gusto lang kita makita
… tapos sumali si boy2 sa usapan
boy2: (para kay boy1) di ba may girlfriend ka na sa yakal?
natameme si boy1
———
BOY: Is this seat taken?
GIRL: NO…. And neither am I….
———
boy: o bakit monay lang lunch mo?
girl: wala kasi akong mahanap na gusto ko sa canteen e, pero kasi anjan ka na…

below were some pick-up lines that you can use while convincing/courting your girl.  let’s start with letter A.

———
Aanhin pa ang alak kung sa akin pa lang, tinatamaan na sila..
———
Aanhin pa ang gravity, kung lagi lang akong mahuhulog sa iyo?
———
Aanhin pa ang sinabawang gulay kung sa ‘yo pa lang makulay na ang aking buhay?”
———
Ako kaya si Omniknight, di ko hahayaang makalayo ka sa akin eh..(DotA)
———
Ako: You complete me!
Siya: Whatever!
Ako: (sabay alis na)
Siya: Wait, Incomplete ka na lang muna balik ka bukas!
Ako: nosebleed!
———
Alam mo ba na scientist ako, at ikaw yung LAB ko.
———
Alam mo para kang beer, intimidating at first, pero once inumin mo okay naman pala. Makes me crazy..
———
Alarm clock ka ba?, Ginising mo kasi ang natutulog kong puso eh.
———
Am I a bad shooter? Coz i keep on missing you..
———
Anung height mo??

(eto follow up pag nasagot na niya height)
ha!?? pano ka nagkasya sa loob ng puso ko..
———
Are you a dictionary?, Coz you add meaning to my life…
———
Are you Jamaican?? Kasi Ja-maican me crazy!!

———

pretty nice! part II soon…

we all knew that life is difficult,  it’s complicated.  but no matter how hard it is we always find a way to make it easy to live… no matter how painful it is we always find time to laugh on it…no matter how unclear it is we work hard to keep it on track…eventhough it is almost lost in the wilderness we always believe that there is hope in it… that’s life… though it sucks it is worth living for…so how’s you life?

i got this from a yahoo article  which commemorates the 30th year of SPAM.  It was on May 3, 1978 that Gary Thuerk, a marketer for the old Digital Equipment Corporation, sent a sales e-mail to 393 users on Arpanet (then a U.S. government computer network and the predecessor of today’s Internet). Little did Thuerk know that he’d just become the world’s first spammer.  So here’s his worlds first spam email….

Mail-from: DEC-MARLBORO rcvd at 3-May-78 0955-PDT
Date:  1 May 1978 1233-EDT
From: THUERK at DEC-MARLBORO
Subject: ADRIAN@SRI-KL

A 2020 WILL BE THERE FOR YOU TO VIEW. ALSO TERMINALS ON-LINE TO OTHER DECSYSTEM-20 SYSTEMS THROUGH THE ARPANET. IF YOU ARE UNABLE TO ATTEND, PLEASE FEEL FREE TO CONTACT THE NEAREST DEC OFFICE FOR MORE INFORMATION ABOUT THE EXCITING DECSYSTEM-20 FAMILY.

Happy Birthday SPAM!